Baby Wilson

I'm 11 weeks, 6 days today. My 12-week mark is tomorrow, but I'm confused. With Gardner, my morning sickness and aversions pretty much ended by that date. Not so this time. My actual quesiness is almost gone, but my aversions are still very present. It's 2:30 in the afternoon now, for instance, and after 2-1/2 hours of grimacing at the thought of anything I had in the house for lunch, I now sit here with a bowl of Cheerios, my old stand-by. I will never get used to the fact that not all things will go as they did the first time!

The baby's still growing up and out, and all of those maternity clothes I shoved at the back of the closet are suddenly having to be surfaced. I still think I feel movement every now and then....minuscule flutters and tiny little brush feelings. Who knows. Wishful thinking, perhaps. But then again, I have always been one with freaky body self-awareness. I am one who can literally feel an illness coming on three days beforehand. I listen, look, perceive. It's a hobby, really! (joking) In all seriousness, I am bound and determined to keep this baby's gender a secret from everyone, especially myself! I think it will be hard to even look at the ultrasound screen in fear that I will see something and ruin this surprise! I think it's great fun to be able to pick out TWO names. I haven't even begun formal looking for names, by the way, in case you're wondering. Two or three names are floating in my and Ken's minds right now, but nothing concrete. I am o...

It's been a few days since I've written, and some things have changed already. For one, I am almost entirely in maternity wear now. I was really hoping to stretch out my wear of my regular clothes, and I can wear some jeans thanks to those link-buckle belts....but my normal, non-pregnant shirts and sweaters are typically all tight and just to the waist (the style I like), and so as you can imagine, my belly hangs out between the hem of the top and the top of the pants. Not a very pretty sight, and definitely not "together" looking. So, I am forced to wear some of my body-hugging maternity tops, some with maternity bottoms and some with my old jeans and sweatpants. Thank goodness for so many clothes being donated from all sides....I had no long-sleeved tops to speak of! I am really grateful for what's been loaned to me. My morning sickness is still lingering, but it's not as often. For instance, I might feel really sick most of the day one day, and feel a...

The compulsive need to clean the house for a new baby, I mean. Nesting, isn't it called? I have been a whirlwind of cleaning rags and mops today (picture it if you will, a cyclone with various cleaning tools whipping out every now and then, cruising around furniture, scaring cats, making everything sparkle in its aftermath). Ha. I don't mean normal weekly cleaning. I mean, wiping down the windows, blinds, vacuuming the upholstery, scrubbing the dials of ovens and knobs of cabinets. Cleaning out junk drawers. Cleaning out the car. Oh, my. (See my post on my other blog about how all of what I did yesterday totally wiped me out. I hope that doesn't happen today, too.) Gardner's wondering what's gotten into Mama. He's glad for a clean house, I'm sure, but he's just wide-eyed with wonder as I dart to and fro. I think I'm done now. The only thing left is mopping. Maybe it's for the baby...maternal instinct. Maybe it's a subconscious p...

I had to stop what I was doing at this very moment and tell what just happened. Ken and I have been trying recently to get Gardner to catch the concept that there is a baby growing in my tummy. He usually just stares blankly whenever we point at and google over my belly, cooing "See? Baby....baby!" over and over. Tonight, out of the blue, however, Gardner came over to me as I was just sitting still. He timidly lifted up my shirt until he could see my bellybutton. He looked straight at it and said, "....Baby." I could not believe my ears. I pointed and repeated what he'd just said, then I asked, thinking it was a long shot, "Can you give the baby a kiss?" He paused for two seconds, then leaned in and gave my torso the sweetest smack I've ever heard. He sauntered back towards his toys, and my vision became blurry with happy tears. Does it get much better than this????

....what I posted about earlier, I mean. About the nausea subsiding a bit. Actually, it hit me with such great force Friday that, for the first time ever, I thought I might actually lose my breakfast (or lunch, or dinner....take your pick). Even lemonade and lemon bars (an online tip I found) didn't phase it. I am 9 weeks and 4 days today, though, and so the end of all of this seasickness is near....I can feel it. I have found that sometimes I feel better when I get out, especially if the air outside is particularly brisk and cold. Sometimes, though, being out just makes me want to go home and lay back down on the couch. I really don't know sometimes. The baby has developed a grasp with his/her fingers this week. It's amazing that our child is only a little over an inch long but can already grasp his/her fingers, toes, whatever. His/her fingerprints are also being formed this week....amazing. By Wednesday, the placenta will begin its job, which will continue until...

The nausea is still here, but not lingering as long per day as it has been. When it hits, oh it hits. I can happily say that it seems to be lessening, just a tad. (Although, from last time, I remember that this can shift from one week to the next. I'm not out of the woods yet.) What HAS happened is an insane sleepiness that has decided to inhabit my body 24/7. I feel as if I've only slept for 5 hours when I've really slept 10. After a nap, when I should feel refreshed, I feel as if I've taken AWAY from my total hours of sleep instead of adding to them. It is completely backwards, a puzzle for my brain to fathom. I feel all day long as if my eyelids are full of sand...wet sand, heavy and dense. My body feels as if it weighs twice what it does, and my fingers are even too weak to open jars and turn keys. I am yawning about as many times a day as I run to the bathroom (maybe more), and my eyeliner is smeared and washed awry by the time noon hits. I don't remem...

There he/she is! Measured bigger than originally thought age-wise, so the due date was moved two days back to August 16th! Baby's head is to the left (at the first plus sign); feet are at the top right (at the other plus sign). We saw the tiny, flickering heartbeat....oh, wow. I forgot how magical that moment really is.

Today is the first doctor's appointment....and ultrasound. Ken and I prayed over the day, and I am ready. It will be werid walking back into that waiting room that I got to know so intimately just 1-1/2 years ago. I can't believe this is happening again.....but I am so overjoyed that it is.

My morning sickness (or rather, most of the day sickness) is beginning to worsen. I am still nowhere near throwing up (thank goodness), but this constant, unending seasickness combined with utter and total exhaustion (which worsens the seasickness) is beginning to take its toll. I feel like a prisoner in my own home. The thought of packing up and going out makes me so tired to think about it that I often have to lie down to rest after that fleeting thought. Not to mention that going out, with all that it entails (exhaust fumes from the cars in front of me, smells that enter my nostrils when I pass restaurants, and the sheer motion of a moving vehicle), makes my stomach turn in and of itself. I have found that my optimistic notion of "I will feel better if I just get out" is not a true one. I know that I am a third of the way through this (Lord willing!), and that gives me hope. I know that I won't always feel tied to my house and have these traveling constraints hold...

Here's a snapshot of my belly at 8 weeks. (I am NOT pooching out intentionally.) I never thought I'd be pulling out stretch-waist pants before I even hit my 2nd trimester.

I am starting to get anxious. Our first ultrasound of this new little baby is one week from yesterday. There is a tad bit of trepidation in my heart as I know this is the crucial one....the one which will set my fears at ease that this pregnancy is a healthy one. (But I cannot and will not think about that.) Secondly, I am kind of dreading the whole reintroduction into the whole prenatal checkup world.... I felt like I would just move a cot in and stay there nightly when I was pregnant with Gardner (especially when you finally end up going twice a week near the end of the term). I am still not a fan of doctor's offices, and this is no exception. Still not used to it. I am looking forward to re-meeting the doctor who delivered Gardner, though....Dr. Hearn....and the doctor who will hopefully deliver this baby. He is the doctor there who used to seem like a rumor to me....I never saw him once until he happened to be on call the morning of September 21st. Some doctors are more ...

Wow, you, little baby, are making my belly stick out like crazy already! Only 7-1/2 weeks old, and already the size Gardner "appeared" when I was 14 weeks along! I can't believe you already have a little face, little transparent skin and tiny little veins. I can't believe that I am carrying another life inside of me. I have felt yucky today, but again, that's just consolation that things are going as they should. I enjoy every part of this, even the "ugh" part. You're worth it.